Please be well, Feefee.

On the previous post, I did say I wanted to take Feefee for neutering and vaccination the next day. It happened too early. After blogging, I went out, wanted to play and pet him but when I called his name, he sat there, ignoring me. If he wasn't running to me, he would mew in respond. But not that day. I knew something was wrong. So I walked to him and picked him up. It was then my mum saw a wound on the back of his leg. We checked and saw that it was serious. So my parents and I rushed to the veterinary.

The doctor checked him and treated his wound. Then he gave him the vaccination. We went home after that. Along the way back and forth, he was so curious, looking out the window. When we reached home, he laid down again. For the whole day, he didn't sleep, didn't eat and didn't drink. He was twitching slightly too and he kept going to wet places and stay there. I texted the doctor asking why he didn't want to eat or drink? He told me it was a normal reaction after vaccination - just a fever and will feel better the next day. So we leave it just that and hoped.

We were wrong. The next day he was twitching even more than the previous day - as if it was hard for him to breath. We called his name and all he could do was to look at us with those pair of pretty blue eyes. It was heartbreaking. Nini came over in the afternoon and we took him to the veterinary. She was the one who recommended me the place as it charges us affordable prices. Doctor wasn't in so we left Feefee there and went for a drink/lunch. Phone call came in the middle and I received the bad news. Feefee has internal bleeding in the stomach and he was injected to stop the bleeding. There's 50-50 chance that he'll survive and all we could do was to pray hard. I've been praying for hours. And I swear I never pray this hard before. Not for anyone. Not for myself. I've been crying since yesterday. And I guess I broke my record of crying. It feels as if I'm clinging on the hope for a family member of mine. A close one. Feefee is the little kitten I look forward to everyday. And I told myself before that I wanted to take care of him until he's old. But he's still a kitten and yet he's... like that.

At night, my parents, sister and I went to visit him again at the veterinary. We were informed that there's a possibility that someone kicked him int he stomach. It's possible. If he were to be hit by a car or a motorcycle, he would break his legs. But no, he only had a scratch on the hind leg which almost healed. He was already walking properly. There's no high places high enough for him to be injured like that so yes, someone kicked him. I don't know why and what's the motive of kicking a little kitten. Fuck them but I will hold no grudge. I will leave it to karma. I forgive that person for now.

Everytime I'm awake, all I could think of was 'God, protect and heal Feefee'. Everytime someone talked about what he used to do, tears would run down my cheeks and my heart sores. Blargh, I never felt like this before.

Dear God,
I love my little kitten. Please don't take him away from me. He's my sunshine on a rainy day. Don't take my sunshine away from me. I'm desperate and I'm begging.